DSv10: Enter the YouTube

It has begun, about 6 videos have been posted to YouTube; and most have gotten zero views:

Boo-hoo ... but the videos are done!

And I've got the second batch on the way; videos for the Manifesting Empathy course (now released).

A second companion course is also outlined (called Diversity Inverted: The First Step Guides) ~ I'm actually excited; I can do video editing relatively quickly at this point ... I got another English student as well.

While I need to return to the sales aspect of the English classes, as I've got a repeat student; I should have more than one by now, but again, I've been focusing elsewhere.

I'm going to make an introductory video for DreamFreely as well; looking to branch into consulting for people thinking of adopting, along with diversity training.

I've cleaned up the ol' LinkedIn to reflect this: https://www.linkedin.com/in/canincarlos/

Alright, I just wrote a thing ... y'all get first peek:

Hell's Kitchen

To be honest, it's not me who is important, but the story is important!

Because it highlights not just white supremacy, but how easily it is for the behaviors to be imitated by anyone, regardless of race, religion or creed.

I'm not angry about it; because I also found a solution for it -- but it starts with a tectonic shift ... instead of thinking of God the Father; he's gotten mixed reviews at best ... and there is a reason for it ... nonetheless, what of the Mother?

She created all, she creates all, and creates space for all ... instead of trying to be like God, who is always trying to make for purpose, and with broken intentions ... I think we are benefited by considering the Mother, and how if she has created space for all, who are we to not do so as well?

That idea is the foundation ... from which to begin reading the poetry of life ... because then we cease looking to support our own perspectives, and start seeing the multiplicity of possibility surrounding us all.

A dear friend of mine and I once had a conversational repartee that began with ... "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM ?!?"

It was in jest, but also ... perhaps a way to recognize the dramatic feats each of us has accomplished in our lives ... because anyone can say that, and those around them can have no idea who that person really is.

Perhaps it is poetically accurate to say that many of us are even lost onto ourselves.

Regardless ... Hell's Kitchen ... I helped them move from the place 80 WhatsThat Street? to Rossi's Blue Star Room; which had a Midas board, and I invited John Devine to play for Valentine's Day – the first musical act in Hell's Kitchen!

But that's not the important part, the almost important part ... well it's like a necessary plateau on the road to the important part ... I have a letter of reference from the CEO of Hell's Kitchen.

The manager in charge of helping the restaurant move was an alcoholic, who fired me ... soon after he was fired, but I wasn't given my job back ... instead, I got a glowing letter of recommendation ...

Which said that I did something, that I never did.

I'm not going to publish it, because the point isn't to make someone look bad ... though it remains an excellent artifact for reflection; why would someone give testament to something that never happened?

The worst way to look at it is to say that I was being set-up to be used by someone else ... that's why I could never use that reference; because that's all it did, it just set me up to be misused.

Which is horrifying, if you think about it.

Someone didn't want me to use the s-word ... because I'm not a descendent of African slaves ... but we can't act like the mentality which allowed slavery to exist, didn't survive the Civil War, and that it doesn't affect us all.

I have had to ask the same of the people who adopted/bought me, and their entire community ... why was I never given support, to the same level of my white peers?

I mean ... they always said it was because I was crazy ... but what do I need to do to not be crazy?

It would seem that eventually, I am kneel to a system, and let it abuse and misuse me ... that's what I need to do, to demonstrate that I'm willing to listen to authority, even when it's ill-informed, misguided, or inefficient ...

Which is the worst, I'm supposed to waste my life toiling under someone else's inefficiency, while getting blamed for my own inefficiencies, and deprived of resources so that I can never truly improve either ...

Here's the kicker ... I think she might still work there, at Hell's Kitchen ... this is the important part ... blonde hair, blue eyes .... if anyone wants a reference for my work and my words about Hell's Kitchen, ask her ... I trust her, completely.

And that's what matters ... even though it was a horrid experience for me ... on all sides ... I didn't walk away with blind anger or any desire for revenge ... quite the opposite ... and that's also what is funny ... I guess ... well, that's the trick.

White people will say that they don't see color (regardless of the color of their skin, that's one way to identify a white person, they all say that they don't see color.)

Which is dumb ... because it truly informs how we all must walk in this world.

But the next step is to see that there is a narrow window of "socially acceptable" behavior ... and much/most of it is centered around how a white person feels at any given time; and the darker the skin tone gets, the less agency one has to truly be an individual beyond the system which centers how the nearest white person feels at any given moment.

These are just the facts ... on the other side, the darker your skin, the further you need to be willing/able to augment your behavior, in order to survive, much less thrive.

And this narrative has been getting re-enforced for generations in the Western Hemisphere, and beyond.

I think that's a major importance of Aja-Adanna (Princess Shuri) ... a black woman who could truly be completely herself; she entirely breaks that mold.

Which I suppose, let's comment on that right quick ... why didn't I capitalize the b?

Because black people who are not descendants of United States slavery are different in most all respects ... because the United States truly sought to strip them of their identities, and Blackness, as the culture that birthed country, jazz, blues, rock 'n' roll, hip-hop, along with a hidden host of inventors, scientists and more ... who held fast to their connection to life, the land, and their hearts.

That is what gave birth to what continually unfolds uniquely as North American Blackness; which is not immune to mimicking whiteness either, though it is exceptional in it's existence as a product of love and memory, and little more, because not much else was allowed, and even Love and Memory were targeted for annihilation.

Which isn't the point either ... the point is that anyone is capable of mimicking egoic, self-destructive, behaviors, regardless of race, religions or creed. (Read elsewhere how whiteness is a product of clinging to ego and the self devoid of ancestral connection.)

Though the next step is to see how that is possible.

While realizing that the why is easy ... proximity to Blackness provides social status, proximity to whiteness provides money/resources ... that's the game.

As for myself ... to be honest, on a spiritual level, I guess ... I feel like ... my identity has roots on this land from before colonization ... and I have no need to look to either whiteness or Blackness for validation or the true roots of my identity.

I have a responsibility to walk in respect for Blackness, and all the culture has provided to help me learn from Tupac to Dr Giovanni and beyond ... and in this way ... it's not about not seeing color.

It's about not letting the single aspect detract from comprehending an entirety of an existence that is fighting to survive behind it.

Because to a degree, that is us all ... fighting to survive as a self we call love when we look in the mirror.

And so it's not about connecting with others, it's about connecting with ourselves, and then being able to see that same dynamism in others.

To accept that level of dynamism, possibility, beauty, pain, confusion and hope; both in ourselves, and in others.

Then we realize that, when we help others, we are in fact helping a part of ourselves ... and in this way ... well ...

Let's not get ahead of ourselves ... but that whole, better more beautiful world folks keep talkin' about ...

I honestly think that this is a step in that direction ... though I digress, and thank you for your time and attention.

peaces, c.